How GOD change my life from sin to the glory things
I was a student of ITB (Bandung Institute of Technology) and now is undergoing a course at the end of the Civil Engineering department. My name is Franklin Kesatria Zai. I was born in the beautiful city of Medan and my family background is quite well known to embrace the “Protestant Christianity” legally.
My father served as an elder at my church in Medan, and now also still serves as an elder (Unit Niha Keriso in nias language) since our family moved to the island of Nias in 2002. My mother is also quite well-known views of his position as representative elder in the church as well as the companion of my father. I’m pretty proud of my family situation like this. Since childhood I was known to diligently go to church every week, is active in the community, actively participates in the church choir, and the activities of the ‘smell’ spiritual. That’s all I do on top of all my ignorance, why would I do that, and also just the encouragement of my family, so I did it as if the routine activities such as my daily activities (eating, drinking, and so on). But I want to say that: No man sees God sees; man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart. (1 Samuel 16:7). Yes, I just like the robot-controlled spiritual activity that I did formerly. Behind all the activities that I do, I realized that my life is actually destroyed, and to cover up the shame that I do activities that are ‘good’ before men, but not before God.
I am devastated by heart since childhood because of myself, my family and also including my friends / my social circle. I was born with a weakened state as a man, and was supported by the condition of my family where I saw my mother as if ruled over my family and my dad like a father who did not show my mind “macho”. So my childhood living under the authority of the family, especially my mom. I also have an older sister, who was often quarreled with her and she always wins, so I consider myself a man who is weak. Not only is there alone, even in my relationships with my friends from elementary through high school since I was dubbed a weak man, with roughly the word called “sissy”. It was really made an impression on my heart and that’s one of my emotional wounds from childhood until I experienced recovery. As a child also because of my naughtiness, I stole my parents’ money. What is the purpose? Yes, the goal so I can snack at school, because I was jealous of my friends who frequent snacks, and I often begging to my friends. This is because I felt I was less noticed by my parents. When my mother knew what I did this, she called me and punish me with a vengeance. She punished me, beat me to use cane, even trample me with her feet. Not only that, she was also locked my bedroom and did not give me food, I even heard that she would endeavor to enter me into an orphanage. She dragged me out of the house, while I can only cry and do not fight because I was in grade school and my strength is not much. I am very bitter with my mom and dad are no exception and my family. They treated me so cruelly. And think it continues to exist until just before I really accepted Jesus as my Savior and Lord and experiencing recovery. Since then I have often rebelled at my parents, even curse them if I was really upset (really what I was sinful).
Time was getting passed and I will finally graduate from high school, and participate in Bogor Bimbel at my sister. At that time my sister was converted and born again, but I do not know. One day, when I was studying in preparation for SNCA, I was approached by my sister’s friend, his name is Desmond, and he talked a lot about the old life and how he was transformed by an extraordinary God. I think that his old life was not much different with my life, and I was amazed to see changes in her life. Until he told me how he accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior, and how his life changed, and then he was also challenged me to let go of my old and my life was saved by the Lord Jesus and make Him as personal Lord over my life. At that time the Lord soften my heart and I accepted Him as my Savior God. I prayed for him and I cried, but there is great joy in my life when I knew I was saved and became a new man in the Lord. That was the beginning of my new born.